Okay!  So now I have more crap to deal with.  Nothing I can't handle, but it's certainly plenty to complain about!

J. got himself a new job, which is exciting and all, but it turns out our insurance will be switching from one (superior) carrier to another (inferior) carrier on August 20th - 5 days before my due date.   So basically, if I have the baby after the 20th, we're gonna be paying a LOT more.  Plus the whole paperwork nightmare.

So since my doc was gonna induce me anyway, I am going to ask him about inducing me before the 20th, heh.  I don't know if he'll go for it, since it's more for convenience sake, but whatever, and stuff.  I'll know more on Friday after my appointment.

AND... there's this lovely hurricane out in the Atlantic headed this way.  If I get my way, and get induced next week, Hurricane Irene is forecast to be near our area at the same time I predict I'll be in the hospital.    Heh.  It's a little early to be stressing about THAT possibility quite yet, so I'll shut up about that for now. 

I had an ultrasound around 34 weeks that indicated that I am NOT, in fact, having a Super Huge Giant Monster Baby.  They estimated that she was around 5 lb 7 oz.  Now, I am well aware that ultrasounds aren't totally accurate, but it did put my mind at ease a bit. 

I have another ultrasound scheduled for next Friday, when I'll be two weeks away from my due date, to check her size.  I guess if she's a SHGMB then, they might induce me a little early.  I'll be induced either way because of the aspirin I've been taking for my blood clotting disorder.  The plan for now is for me to go off the aspirin around August 18th and then be induced on August 25th, so that the aspirin has a chance to get out of my system, but that it isn't out of my system for too long. 

Not that I'm looking forward to being induced AT ALL.  Ugh.  But the only other option is to stay on the aspirin until I go into natural labor.  If there's aspirin in my system at that time, I won't be able to get an epidural if I need one - which doesn't technically concern me THAT much, I mean, if I can't get it, I can't get it.  But if I need a c-section for any reason, and I can't get an epidural for that, they'll have to put me totally under.  And I am NOT cool with that idea.

So, induction it is, I think.  For now, I'm content with sitting around at home all day complaining and drinking cherry Sprite, and shooting daggers at anyone out in public who feels it's necessary to exclaim, "WOW, you look like you're about to POP!"  I've said this before, but there are some things you do NOT say to highly pregnant women, and reminding them of exactly how huge they are, is one of them. 

More updates to follow!

Okay, you know what?  I like Gwyneth Paltrow.  Everyone else hates her, and that's okay with me.  In interviews, they see her as a stuck-up snooty bitch, and I see her as self-deprecating, witty, and charming.  Go figure.

So I'm okay with liking someone no one else can stand (Phil Collins, anyone?).  But if ONE MORE PERSON brings up the "fact" that Gwyneth "stole" Cate Blanchett's Academy Award in 1999 I am seriously going to go off the deep end.   I saw both performances, and they were both good, in my opinion.  And the rumor that a few strings may have been pulled to get Gwyneth the win - shit, that probably happens all the damn time in Hollywood.  So what?   People need to lay off their bitterness over that "undeserved" win. 

Alright.  Just had to get that off my chest. 

Ha ha!  Skeered ya, didn't I?  Yeah, I have been MIA, at least on this journal thinger.  Thought I'd give a quick update.

First of all - babies!  Yes, J and I are expecting late August.  I haven't had many problems so far even though I'm considered high-risk due to my blood clotting disorder.  I haven't had any morning sickness whatsoever, just the urge to eat everything in sight.  Although, that's not technically, like, a departure from the norm or anything.  I have a gut the size of Arkansas right now.  I'm in that stage where I kinda look pregnant if I stick out my belly, but most of the time I just look fat.

Second of all - we moved!  We moved to a bigger house in a better neighborhood with lots of room in December.  House is still full of boxes because I am lazy.  We sold the old house and made lots and lots of money off of it... BUT...

Third of all - unsurprisingly, we owe the IRS more in taxes for 2004 than I even MAKE at my crap job in a year.  Luckily, we have the money from the sale of the old house to pay it. 

Also, as most of you know, my job sucks and I hate it.  So J and I decided I would go part-time starting April 8, and hopefully we'll be able to curtail our "extravagant" (insert hearty laughter here) lifestyle enough so that I can stay at home with the baby starting in August and be a good housewife, eventually.   I've never been that career-minded so this shouldn't be a huge adjustment for me.  The worst part will be not having as much adult interaction.  But I am also looking at beefing up a few of the things I can do from home to earn me some money.  Don't expect me to be hosting your next Mary Kay or Pampered Chef party, however.  Homey don't play that.

That's all for now!  Be back in a few months!  (Insert more hearty laughter)

Happy Birthday to meeeeeeeee Happy Birthday to meeeeeeeeeee Happy BIRTH! DAY! TOOO MEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEE!  Happy Birthday to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! 

I have had lots of cake so far today and will be getting more later on!  And also.... J. got me diamond earrings!  My ears are heavy now!  And also... I know w

Oh, dammit, someone just called me to wish me a happy birthday, and I forgot what I was writing about.  Is it too early to start blaming things on age?

Taken from an article in today's New York Times:

In 1958, an earthquake in Lituya Bay, Alaska, caused a landslide into the ocean that created a tsunami 1,720 feet high, a wave that could have swept over the Empire State Building. Fortunately it headed into a wilderness area and did not travel across the ocean to Hawaii or Japan.

The possibility of great landmasses falling into the ocean is always with us, and recently scientists found vertical fault lines through a volcano on La Palma, one of the smaller and more westward Canary Islands. The volcano has a crater about five miles wide and a half-mile high, and erupts about every 200 years. The last eruption was in 1948, but the newly discovered fault lines have convinced some scientists that eventually the huge crater will break apart and slide into the ocean, bringing more than a half-trillion tons of rock with it.

Since tsunamis are created in proportion to the amount of land that has fallen into the water, this event would likely create a wave mass never before known to written history, many times bigger than the wave at Lituya Bay. The wave would diminish a little as it crossed the Atlantic, but if it hit the Atlantic Seaboard it could be higher than the skyscrapers of Boston, New York, Washington and Miami. Scientists do not know if it will take one, four, or 10 eruptions to separate the landmass, only that the separation is inevitable.

The only good news is that volcanoes usually send signals before they erupt, and it would take eight hours for the wave to travel from Africa to the United States' eastern shoreline. It is not sufficient time, however, to move all the people who would be in its path. In any event, surely the mountain on La Palma should be reduced in size, to lessen the impact should it ever slide into Atlantic. But, who will pay for such a huge reduction of a landmass?

So!  I win the most-bizarre dream of the night award.

I dreamt that Phil Collins got hair-transplant surgery right before the concert.  Nancy and I were in the crowd and he walked out on the stage with a full head of hair and I was HORRIFIED.  Like, almost to the point of crying horrified. 

Looking back on it, it's actually pretty damn funny.

If you know anything about me, you know I am unashamedly a huge fan of Phil Collins.  Go on, mock me, I don't care!  *affixes Phil button*  So in honor of my upcoming Phil Collins Concert Extravaganza (okay, I'm just going to one concert, but I needed a good title for the momentous occasion), I'm gonna post the lyrics to a song of his I've always liked.  Heewig couldn't remember it, so I, being the gentle-spirited friend that I am, promptly forced her to listen to it.  I think we could both relate to the lyrics a little bit.

We never talked about it
But I hear the blame was mine
I'd call you up to say I'm sorry
But I wouldn't want to waste your time

'Cos I love you, but I can't take any more
There's a look I can't describe in your eyes
Yes we could try, like we tried before
When you kept on telling me those lies

Do you remember...?

There seemed no way to make up
'Cos it seemed your mind was set
And the way you looked it told me
It's a look I know I'll never forget

You could've come over to my side
You could've let me know
You could've tried to see the difference between us
But it seemed too far for you to go.

Do you remember...?

Through all of my life
In spite of all the pain
You know people are funny sometimes
'cos they just can't wait
To get hurt again

Do you remember...?

There are things we won't recall
Feelings we'll never find
It's taken so long to see it
Cos we never seemed to have the time

There was always something more important to do
More important to say
But "I love you" wasn't one of those things
And now it's too late

Do you remember...?

So I already posted a picture of Nancy playing in the flood like a damn foo' - but here's one of me!  Roo took it with my phone, which explains why I'm not looking as much like my doppelganger, Rachel Weisz.

Since Roo so lovingly posted a bunch of hideous pictures of me on her blog of our Charleston trip, I thought I'd add my own (also hideous) pictures of me (and other stuff).

But it's late and I'm lazy and sleepy so I'll do it tomorrow. 

For now, here's a cute pic of Nancy!

And another cute picture of Nancy and Roo:

Well, I stole this quiz after seeing it on numerous blogs, and I'm nothing if not a follower.  So here ye are:

20 Questions to a Better Personality

Wackiness: 66/100
Rationality: 34/100
Constructiveness: 82/100
Leadership: 50/100

You are a WECF--Wacky Emotional Constructive Follower. This makes you a candle burning at both ends. You work until you drop, and you play until you can stand to work again. You have so much enthusiasm that you can find it hard to control on your own, and you appreciate the guidance that channels your energy and lets you be your best.

In a relationship, you require lots of attention and support. You often over-contribute and end up feeling depleted and cheated. You may benefit from more time alone than you grant yourself.

Your driving force is the emotional support of others--especially affection. You can run on empty for miles if you have positive energy behind you. Without it--as it occasionally must run dry--you are depressive, listless, and difficult to motivate.

You need a lot of affection. Get it any way you can, but never at the cost of your self-respect or well-being.

Man, I love late 70s / early 80s music videos.   I got me the Police Every Breath You Take video collection on DVD and I'm watching it right now.   I've seen the later videos, of course, on MTV, but these oooold ones are new to me.

Each video up until Invisible Sun is basically the guys standing and/or frolicking in front of some prop, playing their instruments.  Obviously, most of these were made before the MTV era, and while bands still actually PLAYED instruments.  I love it!

Roxanne - As simple as it gets.  It's the band, jamming in a club of some sort.  Sting is very earnest.  He does not want me to sell my body to the night.  I won't, Sting, I won't!  I like the effect of the  red light shining upon Sting.  It's very... um, symbolic, or something?

Can't Stand Losing You - Wow.  Um, yeah, they're playing on a stage.  And Sting has on a red bowtie and the most aDORable glasses.  They're big round Harry Potter glasses!  Even then, Sting knew what would be cool in um... 25 years.

Message in a Bottle - Ooh, this one has a story.  There's a girl walking around.  But the band  is playing in their dressing room.  Oh, wait, I was wrong.  No story in this one.  Where'd the girl go?

So Lonely - The band is playing their instruments in the street. But they are also wandering around the subway with walkie talkies. I dunno. Maybe they're calling the video's director. "What are we supposed to be doing, again?"

De Do Do Do De Da Da Da - they're frolicking on a ski slope.  What does this have to do with the song?  Absolutely nothing!  That's the beauty of it!  No deep message!  We're just having fun on this here hill!  Look at Sting in his snow suit! 

Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - They're in the studio, bouncing around, wearing funny hats.  Now they're outside in what looks like an african village.  Maybe they recorded their album in Africa?  Again, this has nothing to do with the song.  Woot! 

So in addition to the robbers, I have this irrational fear of the tsunamis.  It's a long story, but dammit, they're coming someday, and when they do, I'm going to point to everyone who mocked me about my tsunami fear and go I TOLD YOU SO YOU DOUBTER!

Teem: did you get my email about the giant waves?
Nancy: I did.
Nancy: Except those were, like, in the middle of the ocean  :-)
Teem: pssh
Teem: but if they were a little closer to shore!
Nancy: Riiiiiiight.
Teem: :-D
Nancy: I bet the robbers know when the tsunamis are coming.
Teem: Oh , I bet!
Teem: and I bet they won't even tell me
Nancy: But they'll know when you abandon your house 'cause of the tsunamis and they'll come in by boat and steal all your stuff.
Teem: dude!
Teem: no, see, I need to buy scuba gear for me and J. and the cats
Teem: like wee little snorkels and flippers and stuff
Nancy: Right  :-)
Teem: and we'll lie in wait under the water for the robbers
Nancy: I would like to see you teaching your cats to snorkle.
Teem: I'll start out small.  Set up a pool in the backyard.
Teem: like, a kiddy pool
Teem: or in this case, a kitty pool!
Teem: ha ha!
Nancy: Heee!